“Belonging”: That Elusive and Powerful Feeling
Taking Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion to the next level
The political and social climate of 2020 have led me to contemplate how I can promote and build a more inclusive and fairer world. This wish is not a new one. I recall being touched by a video created by TV2 Denmark in early 2017 called “All That We Share.” The message, powerful then, remains equally compelling today.
Moving towards creating a more inclusive America requires that I recognize my own blind spots and talk openly about how I have benefitted from some of the biases built into the American system.
As a brown-skinned man of South Asian descent, I slot in somewhere above the midpoint on the unspoken “ladder of privilege” in America.
I have several advantages. Below is an (incomplete) list of what I see as my “markers or privilege” contrasted with some (albeit fewer) “markers of disadvantage.” I am coming to terms with how these “advantages” have helped me benefit from systemic biases in the American (and global) job market.
Admitting privileges exist is not meant to discount the importance of hard work, individual effort, skills or other personal, cultivated traits. Privileges/disadvantages coexist with individual effort.
Although my privileges have served me well, especially in the job market, I have at times not felt welcome or that I belong. My hope as a leader is to create organizational cultures that do a better job at ensuring everyone feels that they belong.
Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion: A Critical Starting Point
The ongoing debate over systemic racism and white privilege in America was brought back to center stage following the killing of George Floyd in late May 2020.
Beyond the calls for specific inquiries and justice for those wronged, it sparked a movement asking us all to:
1. Reflect on, identify, and call out “systemic bias” in our organizations.
2. Consider how the lives and everyday experiences of “others” might be different from and harder than our own.
Over this past decade many organizations have funded positions and efforts dedicated to furthering diversity, equity, and inclusion. Diversity trainings are now commonplace. Larger enterprises often have a person in charge of their diversity, equity, and inclusion effort. At smaller companies, there is often a diversity and inclusion group set-up by employees and supported by the company.
A quick set of definitions.
1. Diversity: The visible (and invisible) differences that exist among all people. Organizations made up of people of varying gender, age, race, ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation, background etc. are said to be diverse. More forward-thinking organizations will extend the term to include diversity of thought and values.
2. Equity: Providing fair access to everyone after considering their unique circumstances and different starting points. An example (outside race or economic means) would be when catering lunch for all employees to provide vegetarian, vegan, or gluten-free options.
3. Inclusion: The base level is offering everyone a seat at the table. In its best state, inclusion requires creating an environment where individuals feel respected, listened to, valued, and supported.
Diversity, equity, and inclusion are important initiatives and worthy of praise. They are necessary but not sufficient. Organizations can talk about and act on “diversity, equity and inclusion” without the people whom they are targeting feeling a direct benefit.
The goal must be “belonging.”
Belonging only occurs when the person herself feels the positive impact of these efforts. And truly feels seen, heard, valued and comfortable as a member of the organization or other group.
Diversity advocate Verna Myers has said: “Diversity is being invited to the party. Inclusion is being asked to dance.”
My addition to these words is: “Belonging is feeling comfortable as you dance, not worrying or wondering how you might look or if anyone is staring at you and judging you negatively.”
The Importance of Belonging
Maslow recognized belonging is a fundamental human need; he placed it right in the middle of his pyramid.
Belonging is also good for business. Positive organizational cultures have a strong sense of belonging. Belonging is highly correlated with much higher employee engagement scores.
Deloitte’s 2020 Human Capital Trends Report pointed to a 2019 study by BetterUp on the importance of belonging. The study said a feeling of belonging can lead to a 50%+ increase in job performance and 50% reduction in turnover risk.
Fostering “Belonging” in Your Teams and Organization
My thoughts on how leaders can increase employees’ feeling of belonging and thus engagement with the organization.
Create a Caring Environment: Be kind. Ask questions about items about people beyond their workplace identity. A little bit of caring goes a long way. Our personal and professional lives are ever more intertwined. A Gallup survey conducted in March 2020 report, right after COVID-19 lockdowns began, found that less than half (45%) of employees strongly agreed that their organization cares about their overall wellbeing. Be willing to make time to talk with anyone on your larger team, not just your direct reports. Time is limited and valuable. People will recognize that those who share their time genuinely care about others.
Foster Connections: Connecting people with each other (especially outside their department) mattered even when we all worked in a central office. With all of us sitting in our homes by ourselves, creating connection is even more important. Work extra hard to include the quieter, more introverted people in the conversation (without making them feel too uncomfortable). A suggestion is to ask people on your team what part of the business they would like to learn more about and connect them with a person in that area who is willing to broaden their knowledge.
Recognize Contributions: Everyone wants to do work that is valued and contributes towards the success of the organization. Put individuals in the spotlight from time to time when they have done great work. Do this publicly in a group message or in an All-Hands etc.
Be Transparent: I am a big believer in sharing information with everyone on your team. Keep people apprised of important events in the company especially on other teams. Even in an environment with lots of communication and collaboration tools, people often say they don’t really know what is happening in the organization. Information sharing fosters trust and belonging.
Encourage Questions and Feedback: Empower people to ask questions of you, even difficult ones that put you on the spot. You don’t need to immediately know all the answers. Just be willing to research the question and get back to the person who asked in a reasonable period of time. Being told that no question is off limits will also increase trust.
Make is clear to your team that you are always open to feedback – about you and the company. Some employees are hesitant to give their managers or their team leads direct feedback. Another way to approach feedback is to check-in with people on what they need to be successful in a task or their job. Or what they would like to change if they had a magic wand.
Be Authentic: You have your own leadership style. Embrace it. Authenticity involves not sugar-coating bad news and celebrating wins. Authenticity also means being vulnerable and sharing your weaknesses and mistakes. Being authentic will increase the level of trust your team has in you. Trust will increase their sense of belonging.
I end with this quote from Brené Brown, who has spent a lot of time researching courage, vulnerability and shame. She discovered something interesting about belonging.
“One of the biggest surprises in this research was learning that fitting in and belonging are not the same thing. In fact, fitting in is one of the greatest barriers to belonging. Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be in order to be accepted. Belonging, on the other hand, doesn’t require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are.” (my emphasis)
As managers and leaders let’s model this behavior and encourage our team members to be who they are. In the process we will build a richer, more connected, and more rewarding workplace.